Christmas presents for liberals

Just a few thoughts for all of our friends on the left side of things....

1) The "Ted Kennedy kill your date funpak" - includes one obese blowup doll, one young female blowup doll, a bottle of scotch and a big wheel. female blowup doll includes timer so you know when she's dead! lake not included. bathtub is sufficient.

2) The "I am French funpak" - Just write an Islamic name on one hand, a German one on the other, and beat the shit out of yourself. Keep pummeling your head til you find the white flag! Then Change your name to Helmut Mohammed and renounce American Imperialism!

3) The "Michael Moore - anything can be food funpak" - includes a box. just pick up whatever you see, put it in the box, shake it up, dump it on the floor - then smother it in cheese and ketchup. Voila! You've got a meal just like Mikey! Just keep eating and eating and eating and eating! fork, knife and condiments not included.

4) The "Islam 101 funpak" - includes 20 lbs. of C-4, 20 lbs. of symtex, a butcher knife, an "infidel doll," a 6 yr. old girl, a burqa, a video camera (so even you can make your own terrorist videos!) a dirty bath towel (turbans anyone) Hey kids! behead the infidel, screw the 6 year old, and then blow yourself up at a mall! Just like a real Palestinian! Allahu Akbar!

5) The "Howard Dean foot in mouth kit" - includes Howard Dean quotes. Just read them and feel the shame. Very simple.

6) The "Cindy Sheehan exploit your dead son funpak" - includes blowup doll, 2 litre bottle of ignorance, a shot of arrogance, an "ugly woman" mask, a bullhorn, a video camera, two staffmembers from CNN, a ditch for you to stand in, (just like Crawford,Tx.) and a timer set at 15 minutes so you know when to SHUT THE FUCK UP! Al Sharpton not included.

7) The "John Kerry purple heart kit" - includes toothpick, paperclip, paperwork. stick yourself in the finger, get a purple heart! Just like the "war hero."

8) The "Ward 'shitting bull' Churchill" funpak - includes 10 hippy blowup dolls, (students) an indian head dress, a bow and arrow, a 747 (so you too can ram it into buildings and kill greedy americans, just like Ward wants to) and a list of the roughly 3,000 victims so you can circle the ones you think deserved to die! Just like Ward!

9) The "Moderate muslim kit" - includes a big fucking book of excuses! That way, you don't ever have to confront those that have "hijacked" your religion! (ahem, bullshit) Just follow the simple layout and it'll all be the Jews' fault! For example - "I live in my own shit because __________ !! Nevermind 7th century beliefs! Nevermind oppressive dictators! Correct answer - Israel!!! Works best with "Islam 101 funpak!"

10) The "Air America Everything is Bush's fault funpak" - It's the game that everyone can win! Just draw a card, read the scenario and say "I Blame Bush!" Hurricane? Tsunami? WWIII? Global warming? Bad gas? headache? Remember, in this game specifically made for ignorant Mao-loving, Castro-worshiping douche bags, there's only one right answer - "I blame Bush!"

ha ha he he. Just a couple of thoughts.